SCENE WHERE JOSHUA FINDS OUT BY MIKE THAT KATE (JOSHUA’S GIRLFRIEND) IS PREGNANT.

KITCHEN, INT.
We see a modern equipped kitchen with whitish and beige colours on the walls. MIKE, a late 20s white man and JOSHUA, an early 30s dude are sitting across each other on the kitchen table.
MIKE is wearing a blue shirt, is more casually dressed. JOSHUA is a little bit more formally dressed.
MIKE
(looks concerned)
-Hey, can you pass me the salt please?
JOSHUA passes the salt to MIKE.
MIKE takes the salt but is still concerned.
JOSHUA
(with a hint of irony)
- You’re welcome!
MIKE
(tries to appear natural)
- Hey-dude-I forgot to tell you about
Kate’s friend, Lisa! She’s pregnant!
JOSHUA chokes while eating, MIKE approaches him for help. JOSHUA asks for some water and MIKE offers a glass to him.
MIKE
Dude, are you alright?
JOSHUA
Aha…just died a little bit. That’s all.
MIKE
(Whispers loudly)
-Oh God!
JOSHUA
What?
MIKE
(reassuringly)
Nothing. Everything is fine. Amazing. Perfect.
MIKE’s body language indicates anxiety but with an effort to come across as casual.
JOSHUA
(Looks investigatively). Right…
MIKE
(Tries to maintain his composure again).
-Did you watch National Geographic yesterday?
They said that a woman gave birth to
sextuplets! Amazing, huh?
JOSHUA
-Six little demons ready to eat
you alive, NO THANK YOU.
MIKE is now fidgeting but tries to hide it.
MIKE’s voice gets softer and breaks while eating. He speaks with his mouth half full.
MIKE
-Ever told you about pipefish? The male
is carrying and giving birth to the
babies. Isn’t that incredible?
JOSHUA
(rolls his eyes)
-Yeah, it is like…..what’s the matter with you?
-Is there something you wanna tell me?
(in a misdemeaning manner)
-Is something bothering you?
MIKE
-NO, no, never!
JOSHUA
-Should I ask the CIA?
MIKE stands up and walks away from JOSHUA. He’s not looking JOSHUA when he’s about to say.
MIKE
Oh, and KATE is pregnant.
JOSHUA is in shock. JOSHUA finds it now difficult to breathe. MIKE is still not looking at JOSHUA. JOSHUA is still sitting on his chair.
JOSHUA
-Ah…grr…ahh…wh..whaaaaat…No. No. No. nononono
JOSHUA now runs to the door and manically tries to unlock it. But the door is…locked!
JOSHUA
-OPEN up, open up dammit. OPEN UP!!
I’m dying here. HELP, HELP somebody
help me!! FBI, FBI.
MIKE turns his head to look at JOSHUA now.
MIKE
(smiling and assured)
-Don’t bother, the keys are right here!!(smiles).
JOSHUA jumps at MIKE and they both fall on the floor. They roll a couple of times while fighting.
JOSHUA
-Gimme these, c’monn give them to me.
MIKE
Duuud’ you tryin’ to kill me?
Both of them are rolling on the floor close to the kitchen table when we see a pair of black high heels next to their heads. These heels belong to KATE.
Then the camera rolls up to KATE’s body to reveal KATE, a 28 year-old brunette woman. She is well dressed-not too formal. KATE is a chic young career woman.
KATE had previously gotten out of the other room. She stands still and looks at them stunned while they’re rolling on the floor.
After both of them notice that KATE is looking at them, they stop fighting, there is an awkward beat and then JOSHUA goes on to say.
JOSHUA
-Kkkate?
KATE
-What the heck is going on here?
JOSHUA
-We’re playin’ a little game here.
KATE
(raises her brows)
-A game?
JOSHUA
-Yyeahhh…It’s like..uh..something like…
MIKE
(thinks he outsmarted himself)
-Whoever stands up first…loses!
KATE is looking at them both as if she expects a real answer.
KATE
-Josh?
JOSHUA
-Alright, alright, I’m…shocked about something.
KATE
(nods her head)
I know.
JOSHUA
You do?
KATE
That’s right you schmuck. Did I just land in here?
JOSHUA stands up quickly quite stressed.
JOSHUA
(addressing and looking at them both)
-Did you plan this? Did you two plan this?
MIKE
(defensive)
-No, what are you talking about?
JOSHUA
(accusatory-points at them)
-You all knew about it and planned
this behind my back.
MIKE
(facial of surprise)
-Whaaa?
KATE
(to JOSHUA)
-Stop being paranoid! Only Mike knows.
JOSHUA
-About the…thing??..(grimaces)
KATE
-It’s called ‘’baby’’.
JOSHUA
(to KATE)
-How long have you known about the b..a..b….y
MIKE goes on to respond, either for trying to lighten the tense atmosphere or for thinking that JOSHUA was addressing his question to himself.
MIKE
-Just a couple of weeks ago,
I happened to overhear the girls
talking about the pregnancy test and…
JOSHUA
(to MIKE)
I was talking to her, kiddo!
KATE
-Three weeks ago. No period,
so I had to take the test.
(Her voice softens)
And it was positive. I’m gonna be a mom.
MIKE
(to JOSHUA)
-Annd you…
JOSHUA
(with hand gesture of denial)
-Noooooo
MIKE
(to JOSHUA enthusiastic and funny)
-You’re gonna be a dad!
JOSHUA
(ironic)
-Lucky me!
JOSHUA walks back and goes on to sit on a sofa next to the kitchen, looking pale and about to faint.
JOSHUA
-Oh, God... I'm gonna be sick...!
MIKE
(ironic)
More than you already are?
-Thaaat's the spirit, buddy...
KATE is looking determined, ignoring JOSHUA’s sickness.
KATE
-Noow. We gotta educate ourselves about
pregnancy and kiddos.
JOSHUA
(desparate-distraught)
-Sweet Lord..
KATE keeps on talking, ignoring JOSHUA’s remarks.
KATE
-We’ve got to buy a heck of
books an’ read them all!
JOSHUA goes on in the same mood, only louder.
JOSHUA
Show some mercy woman…!
KATE is not influenced by JOSHUA.
KATE
(having an epiphany)
Lamaze classes! That’s it! An’ many hours of them!
JOSHUA pretends to be much worse, slowly sliding on the floor again.
JOSHUA
(Talks even more loudly)
-But you’re not even bloated yet!!!
KATE is annoyed by JOSHUA’s last comment. She approaches him. MIKE can’t contain himself and is laughing.
KATE
(revengefully)
-Aaand of course we have to invite
my mother to stay with us for a few months.
JOSHUA immediately stands up from the floor. He is now louder than ever. His face really turns to a serious and terrified expression now. He approaches KATE, their eyes lock and he says.
JOSHUA
-OOOHHH MY GOOODD!!
Your mother??
MIKE breaks the 4th wall and looks on camera with one or two brows raised.
MIKE
(jokingly at JOSHUA and in general)
Lamaze classes are like a sanctuary now huh??
KATE
(Looks at JOSHUA in a very naturalistic way)
-Yes dear. You got a problem with that?
JOSHUA stands still. MIKE is watching with attention.
JOSHUA
-You know I can’t stand your mother!
Remember the incident?!
KATE
(patronizing)
-Oh, don’t be such a baby.
MIKE
(Curiously asks them both)
- What incident?
JOSHUA
(to MIKE)
Ready to weep?
JOSHUA walks away from KATE while she’s recounting the story of the incident. MIKE is getting closer to KATE and looks at her and then JOSHUA. JOSHUA goes on to sit on the couch again.
KATE
-Two years ago, JOSH an’ I were
invited to my parents’ country house..
JOSHUA changes his mind about the story. He jumps from the couch and keeps jumping with agony while saying.
JOSHUA
-NO, NO, don’t tell him! You swore
you wouldn't tell anyone!
MIKE
(intrigued now)
-What, what, what?? Don’t say what?
Did he burn the patio?
KATE
(recounting)
-Not exactly MIKE. As you know,
my dad is a heavy drinker.
MIKE
(Reassuringly)
-Of course.
KATE
(high-rising)
-Soo, JOSHUA wanted to prove to my
dad that he is a boozer TOO.
MIKE
(with a grin)
-So?
KATE
-Aaaanndd.. he wet his pants.
MIKE is taken aback. KATE is satisfied for sharing this story. JOSHUA is ashamed and has approached the other two hesitantly.
MIKE
(astonished and cracked up)
-What?? Seriously??
JOSHUA
(Angrily)
-I had like a gallon of beer, ok??
And she keeps callimg me Manneken Pis since then!
MIKE
(to JOSHUA)
Ever been to Brussels?
KATE
(to JOSHUA)
-Come on, honey, can’t you take a joke?
JOSHUA is in despair and brings his hands on his face.
JOSHUA
(With resentment)
-She called me little ******
boy in front of my freaking boss!
KATE
(to JOSHUA)
-Oh, come on, don't be a sissy!
MIKE
(With a serious grimace)
-Yeah little ******* don't be so woosy.
A short awkward beat.
JOSHUA
(wondering)
I wonder how pipefish pee. And…where?
KATE is stepping away from JOSHUA and MIKE for a few seconds. Then she goes on to say.
KATE
I got another confession to make.
KATE is turning towards JOSHUA and is quite happy and vengeful at the same time.
KATE
I’m carrying triplets.
JOSHUA is petrified. An awkward beat.
MIKE
(to JOSHUA)
As long as they’re not
sextuplets, you’re all set.
JOSHUA is in contact with environment again.
JOSHUA
(to both)
Call 911 and then you mom. We’re
building a room for her. For eternity.
KATE
(to JOSHUA)
Enchanted we finally communicate.
MIKE is breaking the 4th wall and smiles to the camera.
MIKE
Annn’ they lived happily ever after.